


In This Moment, Gently Frozen

by AltUniverseWash



Series: Born of Want [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alien Gender/Sexuality, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comfort, Consensual Sex, Consent, Developing Relationship, Earth C (Homestuck), Enthusiastic Consent, Explicit Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, First Time, Grinding, Hand Jobs, Kissing, Multi, POV Female Character, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory, Sex, Sexual Content, Sexuality, Smut, Sweet, Tentabulges (Homestuck), Threesome, Threesome - F/F/F, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Female Jade Harley, Trans Jade Harley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:21:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24335056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AltUniverseWash/pseuds/AltUniverseWash
Summary: Jade Harley, Rose LaLonde, and Kanaya Maryam are sitting on a couch together. What happens next is entirely up to them.This is a NSFW fill expanding a scene in the storyNegotiated Consent- you can read that for context, but this should stand fairly well on its own.
Relationships: Jade Harley/Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Series: Born of Want [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1754740
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	In This Moment, Gently Frozen

**Author's Note:**

> **This fic is NSFW!**  
>  It contains explicit sexual content, including sexual intercourse.  
> This is intended only for adult audiences, and anyone who finds sexual content to be triggering should proceed with caution.
> 
>  **[SKIP TO "WAYS OF BEING" IF YOU JUST WANT THE NEXT STORY IN THIS CONTINUITY!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24681331)** You won't miss any plot stuff - this is here for those who want an expanded look at the Jade/Rose/Kanaya relationship's intimacy and sexual relationship.
> 
> This is an expanded version of a scene in the fic [Negotiated Consent](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23890510), intended as a supplement for that work.  
> If you want the mildly-NSFW, cut-away version of this scene, please consider reading that instead.

I’m not sure I can do this – talk about it.

You know you don’t have to, right? That’s fine. No one is going to make you do anything you’re not comfortable with.

I know – but I _want_ to talk about it. I feel like it’s important to me.

That’s fine too.

I don’t know where to start! At the beginning? I feel like I already went through all of that and… I feel silly about so much of it.   
  
I kind of feel like just… jumping into the middle of things.

Where would you start? If you were to do that, of course.

Probably…

* * *

Rose hadn’t  _ stopped _ kissing her yet – Jade’s lips parted and she could feel Rose’s tongue dart against the inside of her mouth and she felt like she couldn’t breathe. Rose’s fingers on the side of her face were soft – delicate – tracing down the line of her jaw. But there was a sense of strength there too – of the desire to hold on and not let go.

And Kanaya’s hand, linked with hers. Massaging the fingers gently together, the nail of her thumb brushing against Jade’s palm. A sense of the lightest touch.

I didn’t think she was going to be okay with this… but she…

Kanaya wrapped her fingers around Jade’s and Jade squeezed as she and Rose broke the kiss. Rose shifted back on the couch – she was blushing and working her bottom lip in between her teeth. She was beautiful – the blonde of her hair standing out against the rich brown of her skin and… her eyes.

Jade blushed.

Her eyes were a brilliant violet that looked slightly supernatural. And those violet eyes were looking at Jade with a barely-concealed  _ desire _ .

Kanaya leaned in and kissed the base of her wife’s neck softly, muttering something that Jade couldn’t hear. But Rose’s blush got even deeper and she looked down – not away from Jade but  _ at _ Jade, her eyes traveling up and down. Her lips parted and Jade felt suddenly and ferociously vulnerable and, despite the fact that she hadn’t taken off a single article of clothing, _naked._

* * *

Oh my _god!_

You okay?

Yes, it’s just… I can’t believe it happened. I guess I’m still processing it.

You can always stop here. There’s no shame in how you want to present your own experience.

No, no… I wanted to tell the rest. Just… give me a minute.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
Okay.

* * *

“Jade…” Rose’s voice was quiet – despite her boldness earlier, she was quiet. “Are you okay with this?”

Jade nodded. “Y– yeah. I’m okay with this!” She could hear the excitement in her voice – given the expression on Rose’s face, she wasn’t alone in that. And Kanaya – Kanaya raised an eyebrow, smiled, and sank back down on the couch, half-hidden behind Rose’s shoulder.

“Do you mind if I take these off?” She didn’t say  _ what _ she meant exactly. Jade was about to say something when she realized.

She meant _everything!_

Jade nodded, her face on fire. “Okay.” She swallowed a lump in her throat that felt like it was going to stick permanently. She was nervous – beyond nervous. She’d never actually  _ seen _ anyone naked. Not in person. Of course she’d seen photos and videos and stuff but… this felt  _ different _ somehow.

Rose hooked her thumbs under the bottom of her shirt and lifted – the soft, black fabric easily cleared her stomach and breasts, hitched on her shoulders, and came free as she lifted her arms to slide the garment off and toss it to the floor. She wasn’t wearing anything under the shirt – Jade caught herself staring at Rose’s stomach… chest… shoulders… neck… 

Geez – I sound so _desperate_ when I say it all back.

You’re allowed to feel however you want, you know. It’s fine.

Rose smiled at her and then… she took those same two thumbs and hooked them right into the top of her shorts. And with a wink, she lifted her hips up off the couch and slid the shorts down her legs.

If she wasn’t wearing anything under  _ those _ then Jade was going to fucking lose it.

But she was – a pair of violet panties that contrasted sharply with the black denim of her shorts. The shorts went on the floor too and Rose was sitting in Kanaya’s arms and only wearing a pair of panties. Jade felt herself getting warm all over – could feel the urge to reach out and  _ touch _ Rose growing inside of her.

Kanaya looped an arm up around her wife’s arm and kissed the base of her neck again. Another confidential murmur that even Jade’s excellent hearing couldn’t quite catch. The tone was salacious – Jade bit her lip and looked away.

“You can touch me if you want.” Rose’s voice was closer than it should’ve been – she was right there in Jade’s face, grinning. How’d she sneak up on Jade like that? Probably by taking advantage of the… distractions. She was  _ very _ distracting.

“I wouldn’t know where to… I don’t know…” she let out a frustrated groan. “I’ve never  _ done _ this before, Rose!”

“That’s okay…” Rose reached out and took one of Jade’s hands in hers – her fingers were barely brushing Jade’s and sending out little bursts of sensation as she gently twined their hands together. She guided Jade’s hands down to her stomach.

“I noticed you staring,” Rose winked and pressed Jade’s hand to her stomach – she felt soft and warm and a little bit…

She was a little bit _squishy!_

Jade giggled and blushed deeper. “I like it a lot.” She wasn’t really worried about coming across as silly anymore – it felt like the time for that had already passed.

“Uh huh –” Rose took Jade’s hand and guided it up along her torso to her breasts. Softly – but firmly – she placed the hand on her left breast – Jade could feel the stiff little bump of Rose’s nipple under her palms and heard herself let out a little squeak of a noise.

“Jade,” Rose said, leaning in closer. “You can touch me if you want. It’s fine… it’s  _ really _ fine.”

Jade closed her eyes. And then…

She moved her hand from Rose’s chest – out of Rose’s hand – and settled it on Rose’s thigh – inches from that spot between her legs. Jade heard  _ Kanaya _ let out a moan and to be honest she wasn’t sure what the troll was doing. She was so focused in on…

“It’s okay,” Rose said slyly. “Please.”

Jade touched her first two fingers in between Rose’s legs and…

Oh god it’s embarrassing. Give me a minute…   
  
Okay.

Her underwear was thoroughly wet. Jade pressed her fingers in and heard Rose sigh.

“Feel free to work in around the panties,” Rose said quietly.

“I… I’m not sure.”

Rose nodded. “Only if you’re comfortable – this is fine… this is all fine…” her breathing quickened.

“No… I want to try it out.” Jade slipped her hand in under the waistband of Rose’s panties, feeling the rough texture of the closely-shorn hair underneath. She let her fingers wander down, playing with the folds and feeling the warm, hot skin under her fingertips. Rose reached out and grabbed her wrist, groaning.

“You’re not… you’ve never done this?”

Jade shook her head and, unexpectedly, Rose smiled. Jade thought she’d be upset but… she seemed to be enjoying herself.

Rose’s fingers darted in on top of Jade’s and she linked their fingers together. “Okay… so… feel right down… there.” Jade felt the little nub of skin under her fingertip. “Just… oh…” Jade tried massaging slightly and Rose let out a loud-ish  _ mmm _ that said that maybe she was onto something.

“Yes!” Rose’s eyes locked with Jade’s and she was smiling. “I mean… that’s good. Or… if you’re feeling adventurous…” she linked their fingers again and guided them down, pressing them up against the folds of skin and… curling two fingers up inside and…

It was so  _ warm _ and Jade felt Rose tense up as soon as Jade’s fingers were inside. Rose leaned forward and grabbed the back of Jade’s head to steady herself, then bent in and kissed her right on the neck. Jade felt the warm sensation spreading through her entire body and she moaned in spite of herself.

It felt  _ right _ to move her fingers a little – she tried that. Rose moaned in response and whispered into Jade’s ear. “You’re doing fine.”

A little bit faster – Rose kept tensing and relaxing in response to what Jade was doing with her fingers.

And then… she felt another hand on top of hers and saw Kanaya sliding in around the side. Kanaya, who was beautiful in a very different way from Rose – a way that Jade could only describe as  _ ethereal _ .

Kanaya leaned over to the other side of Jade’s neck – the one not currently occupied by a very  _ involved _ Rose. And she whispered –

“If I may offer a small piece of advice…”

Jade turned so that she was face-to-face with Kanaya. The troll’s eyes were half-closed and she looked like she was… enjoying herself immensely. Her lips were half-parted. Jade bent in…

I can’t believe I did this! I was so fucking _nervous!_

She kissed Kanaya on the lips. The troll’s lips felt different than Rose’s – the texture was firm, but also soft. It was a hard sensation to describe, exactly, but it was a  _ nice _ one. The faintest taste of mint on her lips.

“Okay, Kanaya,” Jade said as the kiss ended. Kanaya… Kanaya  _ smirked _ at her and Jade felt her hand slip in under the waistband of the panties. She laid her fingers on top of Jade’s.

“If you take these two fingers like this,” she tapped on Jade’s hand. “And then curl them back in towards yourself…”

Jade did what she suggested and she heard Rose  _ moan _ in response. Kanaya was still smirking.

“Rose is very fond of pretending she does not care about these sorts of things, but she is effectively putty if you… handle her in the right manner.”

“Not fair, Kanaya,” Rose murmured as Jade kept moving her hand. “No fa–” she gasped and Kanaya leaned in and kissed Rose’s neck.

“I am simply assisting our new partner, if you do not object.”

“Oh… fuck no…” Rose closed her eyes tightly.

* * *

I was worried about the next part.

Why?

I wasn’t… I was afraid that they’d see me differently after. That they wouldn’t like me anymore, you know?   
  
Even though I think maybe… maybe Rose already knew. Seer of Light and all that.

* * *

“Rose?” Jade’s voice sounded small – she drew her hands back from Rose’s panties and her hands strayed to her own simple, black robes. “I’d like to…”

She still felt embarrassed. In spite of what she’d just been doing to Rose – and with Kanaya  _ helping, _ no less – she still felt a little bit embarrassed.

“You want to take off the robes, and you’re worried that when I see you I’m going to freak out and this is going to be over.” Her voice was calm, plain, and surprisingly matter-of-fact. “You think that everything that’s been happening here is an illusion and you’ll be alone again.”

Jade felt herself starting to cry – the treacherous, boiling tears sprouted unbidden from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. She heard a sob escape her.

And she felt a pair of soft hands at her waist, gathering up the fabric of her robes.

“I promise,” Rose said softly. She leaned in and touched her forehead to Jade’s – their noses brushed and their lips were less than an inch apart. “I promise that won’t happen.”

Jade nodded – Rose rode the robes up Jade’s legs, over her torso, and up over her head. Jade was immediately reminded of the fact that she typically wore nothing under her robes. After all, who was there to tell her how to dress herself and what conventions of decorum to follow? But once the robes had joined Rose’s clothing on the floor by the couch, she was suddenly – almost  _ painfully _ – aware of how  _ vulnerable _ she felt.

She was naked in front of Rose and Kanaya and no matter how much she  _ wanted _ to hide how she looked – no matter how much she wanted to keep folding herself into the robes that concealed her figure – she had chosen to take that option away from herself.

She was starting to cry again. No matter what Rose said, it probably didn’t matter…

“Oh holy fuck you’re gorgeous.” There wasn’t a single ounce of pretense in her voice.

Rose moved forward and leaned into Jade – the warmth of her naked body pressed up against Jade’s chest. That same all-over heat that Jade felt spreading through every single part of her. She was still crying, but the meaning of the tears had changed.

“What?” It was all she could think to say.

“I said you’re fucking gorgeous,” Rose said – her eyebrows raised. “Are you okay with… can I touch you?”

If she were being completely honest with herself, Jade hadn’t thought it would even go so far as that question. She caught her breath.

“Yes.”

Rose’s soft hands were on her waist, circling around to her stomach. She flinched – it tickled.

“Uh… maybe not the stomach – it tickles and… I don’t like it.”

Rose’s hands immediately moved up, toward her breasts. Cupping, gently squeezing. A soft “is that okay?”

Jade moaned. “Yes!”

Fingers moving on her nipples – teasing, but not rough. Trying not to tickle her again. Considerate. Jade bit her own lip – felt her breathing speed up and start to hitch as Rose continued to touch her. Rose pushing up against her, lips hovering inches from the side of her face, feeling the soft breath on her cheeks.

She reached past Rose and took Kanaya’s hand again, squeezing hard and closing her eyes tightly. With her eyes closed, it was like her sense of touch came alive – she could feel the delicate trace of fingers running down her side, avoiding the sensitive spot on her stomach, and continuing to her hips.

“Jade?” Rose’s voice again – so close to her. “Can I touch you?” She gave Jade’s hip a gentle squeeze and Jade knew  _ exactly _ what she meant. She kept her eyes closed – focused on the feeling of Rose’s hands on her hip and Kanaya holding her hand.

In that moment, she had never wanted anything more.

“Gentle…” she moaned. “I’ve never…”

It  _ was  _ gentle – Rose’s hand on her, softly brushing up and down. Jade kept her eyes closed – 

If I opened my eyes, it’d stop being real.   
  
I don’t care if it doesn’t make sense – it’s what I thought!

She  _ moaned _ and arched her back. Kanaya squeezed her hand tightly and Jade pulled – trying to draw the troll closer.

Jade opened her eyes.

Rose was looking at her – staring into her eyes – a beautiful pair of violet gems set inside a face that was smirking at her as she savoured every second of this. Jade was staring – Rose was staring back – and she wasn’t  _ stopping _ . Jade moaned and bucked her hips forward and she saw Rose grin at her.

“You’re fucking _adorable!_ ”

Rose’s hand tightened and she closed her eyes with a moan.

“Please…”

Rose stopped moving - her hand hovering by Jade’s hips. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing… I…” she felt like she was going to start crying again. Why was she crying? “I’ve never… I don’t…”

Rose’s hands were at the sides of her face again, cradling her. Rose kissed her cheek. “Do you want to stop?”

God no – I just… I wasn’t sure how to say it.

“No, please…” She reached her free hand up and threaded it into Rose’s hair. “Please don’t.”

Rose kissed her again – and her hand drifted back down again.

“Kanaya…” Jade murmured.

Why did I say that, anway? I… I guess I didn’t think about it. I just kind of…

Kanaya leaned in, past Rose’s shoulder – the three of them were all balled up together with Rose still pressed up against Jade and Kanaya leaning in.

“Yes, Jade?” her voice was breathy – soft – anticipating.

And then I said…

“Why are you still wearing your clothes?” Jade moaned again.

* * *

It was uncharacteristically bold, I’ll admit.

I know, right! I still can’t believe it!   
  
But it felt _freeing_ to say it. Like –

* * *

It was like she’d been afraid to  _ live _ for so long, and now she was being given this opportunity that felt so good it was almost painful. Almost  _ too _ perfect and some piece in the back of her mind kept nagging at her that this wasn’t real. Either it was all going to end horribly or it just wasn’t even happening in the first place.

Kanaya was undressing. She stepped off the couch and removed her skirt first, folding it into a neat bundle and placing it on the floor. She removed her shirt as well, following the example of the skirt and folding it before placing it down. She was, unlike Jade or Rose, wearing both a bra and panties – black with a trim of black lace.

“I suppose the general tone of the day is that we will not be wearing anything at all,” she said quietly. And just like that, Kanaya was standing naked next to the couch.

Jade couldn’t stop staring. She looked Kanaya in the eyes and was greeted with a wink – Jade quickly dropped her gaze. Down past the breasts and the line of grub scars on her sides. Down to the jade of the bulge between her legs. Jade’s face was on fire again and she looked back up at Kanaya’s face – which was a mistake because Kanaya was looking right back at her.

“You are, of course, welcome to look at long as you would like,” she said in a voice that was oddly playful for a troll who was normally a bit on the stoic side. Kanaya took a step closer. “Or touch, if you’d prefer.”

* * *

God there was so much going on at once! Like, it was hard to even keep track of everything.

You handled yourself admirably, given the circumstances.

* * *

It was getting overwhelming. Two women who she  _ desperately _ wanted so much from – the sensation was getting to be too much. Rose’s hands touching her, stroking, and the feeling of having Rose pressed up against her. Kanaya standing in front of her.

That the inciting incident to all of this was a kiss on the couch seemed unreal. All of it seemed unreal.

She couldn’t–

Couldn’t take it–

Felt herself losing control – a spasm and a rush of warmth and joy up her body and she shuddered and cried out and she thought she said Rose’s name but she wasn’t even sure. Her eyes closed and grabbing the back of Rose’s head and moaning.

She heard Rose laugh – a light sound that made her feel  _ safe _ and she didn’t want to be anywhere else.

A shudder through her body and she relaxed and…

“Oh god I’m sorry,” Jade said.

She heard Rose laugh again. “It’s fine… that was kind of the goal, right?”

A trace of something wet on the tips of Rose’s fingers, up her chest. Rose bringing a finger to her own lips and…

Oh god it’s embarrassing to talk about!

Jade felt herself shaking – she wasn’t sure  _ why _ but nothing about this was exactly familiar territory. Rose sat back up on the couch and looked down, her face layered with concern.

“Are you okay?” she asked, putting a hand on Jade’s shoulder. “Was this too much to start?”

“Uh…” Jade managed to stammer out. “Maybe a bit overwhelming…” she lay back down on the couch.

Rose slid over to one side and tucked herself next to Jade, and then Kanaya lay on the couch as well, snuggled up next to Jade and pressing their very-naked bodies together. Jade blushed and put an arm around Kanaya.

“Is it okay if I hold you?” she asked – she wasn’t sure how all of this worked quite yet.

“Of course you may hold me,” Kanaya responded with a smile. “I have not rescinded my previous offer with regards to your touching me.”

“Oh.” Jade pulled her in closer. “So… uh…”

It was extremely difficult  _ not _ to be self-conscious. She was, after all, lying completely naked on a couch wedge between a Rose who was wearing only a pair of panties (which had somehow, bafflingly, stayed on throughout the proceedings) and a Kanaya whose also-naked body was pressed up against hers in a way that was extremely difficult to ignore.

Especially the wet press of the bulge against her hips. Jade flushed. “So…”

“There appears to be something on your mind,” Kanaya said quietly.

“How does – you know…” Jade trailed off.

She felt Kanaya laugh – her whole body shuddered a little and shifted against Jade and Jade let out a noise that wasn’t quite a  _ moan _ but also wasn’t quite  _ not _ a moan either.

“I am afraid I do not know, Jade – you will have to be more specific.”

* * *

I swear to god she was doing that on purpose.

I suppose it’s a distinct possibility.

No, I’m one-hundred-per-cent sure she was doing that on purpose!

* * *

Jade stammered. “You know – how does – _you know!_ ” She wasn’t sure why she was having trouble saying it, given the circumstances. Kanaya was pushed up against her – no, that wasn’t right.  _ She _ was pulling Kanaya up against her. She wanted to…

“How does it _work?_ ” Jade asked. “How do you and Rose… uh… do it?”

She heard Rose snort out a tiny laugh from behind her and felt a hand grabbing at her ass. Jade squeaked and pressed herself even more into Kanaya.

“Mechanically speaking?” Kanaya asked. “You’re wondering about what your options are with regards to engaging in sexual intercourse with me?”

Jesus Christ I forgot she said it like that.

But Kanaya laughed – “I’m joking with you. I know what you’re asking.”

“She could probably  _ show _ you.” Rose’s voice, from behind her head. Jade hadn’t realized it was possible to verbalize a _wink,_ but Rose had someone made it happen. “I think she’d probably like that.”

Kanaya turned deep jade – she was only an inch or so from Jade’s face and looking directly into her eyes. Jade found herself feeling – not embarrassed this time. More intrigued than anything else.

“I would be willing to show you, if you are amenable to that fact,” Kanaya muttered.

Rose’s voice again, slurring with a kind of happy tiredness – “She’s saying she wants to fuck you, Jade.”

Jade’s face was hot – and she was staring at Kanaya’s face as her expression grew heavy and the tip of her tongue danced along her lips. Jade watched the troll’s mouth quirk up into a smile.

“That is essentially accurate,” Kanaya said.

Jade pressed her forehead against Kanaya’s and closed her eyes. “Okay. Yes.”

Hips pressed up against hers and the feeling of the bulge rubbing up against her – slightly damp but not slimy. Jade moaned for what felt like the hundredth time. It felt good – of course it felt good. Everything they’d done had felt –

It felt almost like being  _ grabbed _ and Jade’s eyes snapped open. Kanaya was looking at her intently, studying her face. This was different – Rose had been a little bit  _ smug _ about this. She’d been playful and fun about it, but also a little bit  _ in control _ about it. And that felt good. But Kanaya…

Kanaya was watching her with eyes that were completely, unerringly sincere.

She didn’t want to hurt me – she wanted to make sure I was okay. She wanted to do this just as much as I did…

“I understand it may be different than what you are used to,” Kanaya said – her voice was barely a whisper. “As Rose has already said you may stop at any time.”

Jade shook her head. “Please don’t stop. It’s fine – it feels good.”

It did. It  _ did _ feel good. Not a sensation she was used to. Different than the way that Rose’s hands had felt. Different to how her own hands had felt in the past. Almost… it reminded Jade of the way that Rose’s tongue had felt as it flitted in her mouth. Something that was muscular and a bit wet, but also pliable and soft. The word  _ tentacle _ seemed to be a bit on-the-nose. Bulge? That was what she always heard the trolls saying and she –

She moaned. Again.

Whatever the word was, it was rubbing against her in a spot that was sensitive, and responsive. She felt Rose press up against her from behind.

“Feels good, yeah?” Rose’s voice – some of the playful smugness was gone now – as if Rose sensed that this was an experience that was unusual enough that it was going to take some time to process.

And yes, it felt good. She rocked her hips forward, pressing herself into Kanaya’s bulge and hearing –

Oh shit the way she sounded.

– the troll’s sharp intake of breath. Grinding hips against hers. Kanaya was still looking into her eyes and even though this was about the most self-conscious she’d ever been in her life, Jade didn’t want to look anywhere else. She kept staring – kept feeling the rocking of the bulge against her crotch – the building of sensation.

Kanaya breathing – heavy, intense – not saying anything. Jade didn’t know what to think about what was happening. Didn’t care what to think about what was happening. Faster. Kanaya reaching up and grabbing a handful of her hair and groaning. Faster.

Kanaya’s body shuddered and Jade felt something damp by her hips and she felt herself losing control. It was too much to process all at once – too much to have moved from the awkward kiss to whatever – to whatever was happening right now. Had it really been the  _ same day?! _

Jade felt herself tipping over the edge again – her body deciding it had just  _ had enough _ and the orgasm spread from that one point between her legs to everywhere and she shuddered and grabbed desperately at Kanaya’s back and let out a high-pitched noise that she had  _ not _ been intending to make.

And she felt herself slowly drawing back into herself – Kanaya had stopped moving and was only pressed softly up against her. Jade opened her eyes.

Kanaya was looking back at her, smiling a little bit. Still not looking smug – there was such a depth of  _ care _ behind that smile and Jade…

She started to cry again. Kanaya’s smile dropped and she leaned in.

“Jade? Are you okay?” she sounded worried.

For that brief second, it was only the two of them in that singular moment – and Jade nodded and smiled. She pushed her forehead against Kanaya’s and their noses brushed together – the same gesture she’d used with Rose.

“I’m fine,” she said. “I think… maybe I needed this.”

* * *

Oh shit

Are you doing all right?

Yeah, just… this was such a _personal_ thing to share!

I can delete it, you know. Just – _poof_ – no one will ever see it. No one will ever know except the people who were involved.

Hmm.

_Hmm_ as in you want me to delete it?

No… I was just wondering. How many different ways this could’ve gone. Maybe some of them, it wouldn’t have ended so nicely.

That is a fair point. But it sounded like it ended well enough, all things considered.

I think that’s why I don’t want you to delete it. It matters to me. Maybe… maybe it’ll matter to someone else too.

I was originally going to make a joke here but… you know… you’re being completely sincere and I don’t want to undermine that fact. I changed it.

Thanks.

* * *

Kanaya had shifted to the front of the couch and Jade’s head rested on her thighs. Her thighs were still a bit… not quite _sticky,_ but the word felt at least somewhat appropriate. She smelled nice – it wasn’t a scent that was easy to place for Jade, but it was pleasant. Something she wouldn’t mind smelling more of – wouldn’t mind… 

She put those thoughts aside for later. It had been a good start, but she was feeling tired.

Rose rested along her side, laying with her body snugged in the crook of Jade’s arm and her head up against her breasts. She still, miraculously, had the panties on. Her hand kept moving absentmindedly between the spot between Jade’s legs and her own, then tracing up and down the sweat on Jade’s chest – not really seeking any specific purpose but just playing around in a way that still felt pleasant.

She felt good. Physically, of course, the experience had been…

Jade’s mind searched for the right word.

_Satisfying._ It had felt good. And neither Rose nor Kanaya seemed to have any particular expectations for what they’d been doing together.

There was more to it than that – it had made her feel  _ safe _ in a way that was hard to pin down. She’d never felt any pressure to do anything. Never felt like she was going to mess something up and end up being hurt. Jade had the strong sense that a threesome involving one of your best friends and an other-dimensional alien wasn’t exactly a normal first time, but it had felt as natural and right as anything she could imagine.

Jade closed her eyes – she could feel the big, dopey smile on her face.

“What’s your deal?” Rose asked, her hand still making its gentle circuit from Jade’s body to Rose’s and back.

“Nothing,” Jade said. “I’m just happy.”

Rose made a  _ hmph _ that sounded generally pleased. The hand made its rounds – tracing down the chest – avoiding the stomach – down to the hips.

“I’m glad.”

Jade heard Kanaya yawn. “I believe that went quite well.” She sounded sleepy.

Rose laughed. “Yeah, no shit, Sherlock.”

“I do not know who this Sherlock person is but she sounds quite astute and probably also very good looking,” Kanaya responded – Jade could hear the smile in her voice. Rose laughed.

Jade could feel herself starting to drift. More than anything, she just wanted to stay inside of this moment forever. She wanted to bathe in the warm afterglow and drink in the feelings and the scents and the memories. Jade hadn’t been sure how she was going to know what felt  _ right _ when it came to any of this – that was a question she’d been struggling with. She’d been looking for some indication of whether or not her feelings were valid. Some kind of  _ sign _ that this was actually the right thing to be doing.

And this moment... this snapshot of pleasant time – gently frozen in the eye of her mind – seemed like as good a sign as any.

**Author's Note:**

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